Lake Jackson, TX –-(Ammoland.com)- The owners of SwampButt Underwear LLC will not sponsor Super Bowl 51, even though the game will be played in Houston, TX, very close to the company headquarters. The reasons for the decision are many including an already crowded marketplace for the annual game and the risk of brand over-exposure. Plus, it is just really expensive.
Company officials confessed that it was a matter of dollars and cents that drove the decision. “Tickets to the game cost in the thousands, which makes a paid sponsorship impractical for us,” said company president Harold Nicoll. Though Nicoll concedes that all male Super Bowl fans at the game and watching on television (along with most of the players) will be wearing underwear that day, he and his staff cannot justify the expense.
It’s The Money, Stupid
The cost of a 30-second ad on television for the game is priced at approximately $5 million. That amount is only for the broadcast time and does not include script writing, direction, talent fees, editing, re-shoots and pointless criticism from in-house corporate shills, or any of the other production costs associated with these commercials.
“It doesn’t take a whiz to know that football fans universally all go to the bathroom during commercials for the Super Bowl or any other sporting event,” Nicoll said. “If we made beer or coffee or watermelon or bottled water or high capacity toilets, or even adult diapers it would probably make sense, but we don’t.”
Other Not Sponsors
SwampButt Underwear is not the only company not advertising for the Super Bowl this year. Companies that include Frito-Lay, Toyota, and probably a lot of others are also not advertising during the Super Bowl. “We spend our own money and are careful that it is invested in customer service, a quality garment, and events that the average person can attend without going into debt,” Nicoll said; “We do not flush profits or resources away.”
About SwampButt Underwear
SwampButt Underwear LLC is registered in the state of Texas. It is owned by two friends who before they did anything decided that their friendship came first and that if there were any conflict at all, they would dissolve the business. So far so good.
We sell underwear for men who really sweat a lot south of their belt line. We also sell t-shirts that are similarly engineered. SwampButt Underwear is a registered trademark with the United States Patent and Trademark Office. We paid a lot for it so please do not use it without permission.